The Most Dangerous Career Myth Women Still Believe

We’ve been taught that a steady paycheck means security. That may be the most dangerous career myth women still believe. Because what happens when the company holding that paycheck also holds all the cards?

I remember racing to catch my train after a full day at work. My boss looked at me and said, “Half day, Monique?”

I was delivering results. Exceeding expectations and quotas. Doing the job I was hired to do. And somehow, leaving on time was still treated like a character flaw.

Sound familiar?

That experience was part of what eventually pushed me to start my own business. Not because entrepreneurship is easy. It isn’t. But because I wanted something more valuable than the appearance of security.

I wanted choices.

That distinction came up repeatedly in my recent Possibilities conversation with Beth Mazza, a serial entrepreneur who co-founded and sold two consulting firms while raising four children.

Beth and her business partner, Victoria Sivrais, who was raising five children, have written Entrepreneur Like a MOTHER: Build a Company That Buys You Freedom, Not Owns Your Life.

And while the book challenges the idea that women must choose between serious ambition and motherhood, our conversation uncovered something even bigger.

The real question isn’t whether women can have it all. It’s whether we’re building careers and businesses that give us any say in what “all” looks like.

The Corporate Safety Net Isn’t Always What It Seems

Beth said something during our conversation that I told her I’m going to borrow: you tend to believe corporate is a safety net until you’ve been laid off once.

She’s got a point.

We talk about traditional employment as the responsible choice. The steady paycheck. The benefits. The predictable career path.

And those things have real value.

But let’s not confuse them with guarantees.

A reorganization, a change in leadership, a new set of priorities, and suddenly the security you thought you had can disappear.

Beth shared a story about Victoria, who had just become the youngest managing director in her firm’s history and landed a major client. When she announced her pregnancy, a senior managing director told her that her priorities were going to change.

Think about that.

Her accomplishments hadn’t changed. Her capabilities hadn’t changed. But someone else had already decided what motherhood would mean for her career.

And this isn’t just about working mothers.

Beth and I also discussed what happens when women are invited into leadership positions without receiving the authority, financial visibility, or compensation that should accompany them.

A seat at the table means very little if you aren’t allowed to influence what happens there.

Here’s something I’ve believed for a long time:

A happy employee is someone who knows she’s valued and could leave, but chooses to stay. Not someone who stays because she’s afraid she has no other option.

That is a very different definition of security.

Financial Independence Is About Having Options

One of the most practical ideas Beth shared is what she calls your freedom number.

It’s not necessarily a number that allows you to retire tomorrow or walk away from everything.

It’s an honest understanding of what you have, what you need, and what it would take to give yourself more choices.

Could you afford to leave a job that no longer serves you? Could you take six months to test a business idea? Could you turn down a client who is costing you more than they’re worth?

You cannot answer those questions confidently if you don’t know your numbers.

Beth told a story about a business owner who wanted to fire a difficult client. Her response was simple: What does your financial statement say?

The owner was running a business bringing in hundreds of thousands of dollars annually without the financial reporting needed to answer that question.

That’s a problem.

Because freedom isn’t simply being able to say no.

It’s being in a position where saying no doesn’t put everything else at risk.

If You’re Going to Bet on Yourself, Do the Homework

Now, Beth isn’t suggesting that every woman should quit her job tomorrow and start a company.

Neither am I.

Entrepreneurship can create freedom. It can also create a very expensive, all-consuming job if you don’t build it thoughtfully.

One of Beth’s most provocative arguments is that women need to stop assuming a passion project automatically translates into a viable business.

She recommends looking at the total addressable market before getting emotionally attached to an idea. Her rule-of-thumb for someone aiming to build a seven-figure business is to have an addressable market of at least $100 million, with room to grow.

That’s her benchmark, not a universal requirement for every successful business. The larger lesson is to understand the economics of the opportunity before you commit your time, money, and energy.

Beth and Victoria also established financial non-negotiables when building Clermont Partners. Their recurring revenue needed to cover operating expenses. Project revenue was additional upside. They maintained an operating reserve and were deliberate about debt.

None of that sounds particularly glamorous.

Good.

The point isn’t to look like a successful entrepreneur. It’s to build something that actually works, and doesn’t consume the life you were trying to improve.

Your Network Is Part of Your Financial Strategy

Beth introduced another concept I loved: the Kitchen Cabinet.

It’s the group of people you intentionally surround yourself with as you build your career or business.

She divides them into three categories:

→ Cheerleaders: People who encourage you, but also know enough about your reality to tell you the truth.

→ Compensators: People with knowledge, expertise, or skills you don’t have.

→ Connectors: People who can open doors and introduce you to opportunities you might never access on your own.

We tend to think of networking as something we do when we need a job, a client, or a favor.

Beth treats it as infrastructure.

And she suggests dedicating just 30 minutes a week to developing those relationships.

Think about the difference that could make over a year.

Financial independence doesn’t mean doing everything alone. In fact, knowing when and whom to ask for help may be one of the smartest moves you make.

And What About the Mom Guilt?

We couldn’t have this conversation without talking about motherhood.

Beth shared that she recently apologized to her grown son for something she hadn’t managed to do for him when he was in kindergarten.

His response? Essentially, Mom, get a life.

We laughed, but there was something important underneath that exchange.

So many women carry guilt about the things they couldn’t do while working, building businesses, raising children, and managing everything else life throws at them.

But Beth now sees something else in her grown children.

Resilience.

They learned to adapt when plans changed. They learned that their mother had responsibilities and ambitions beyond their immediate needs. They learned how to handle situations when someone wasn’t there to clear every obstacle out of their way.

We talked about helicopter parenting and snowplow parenting, and whether our efforts to make everything easier for our kids sometimes deprive them of opportunities to become more capable.

It’s worth asking.

Maybe being a good mother was never supposed to mean being available for every single moment.

And maybe the example we set by pursuing meaningful work is part of what we give our children, not something we take away from them.

Stop Asking for Permission to Define Success

What I appreciated most about my conversation with Beth is that she doesn’t romanticize entrepreneurship.

She talks about financial risk. Market research. Support systems. The uncomfortable decisions that come with building and scaling a business.

She also understands something I wish more women would give themselves permission to believe.

You can be ambitious without wanting someone else’s version of success.

You can love your career without making yourself indispensable to an organization that doesn’t reciprocate that loyalty.

You can build a business without sacrificing every other part of your life to prove you’re serious.

And you can be a wonderful mother without getting every single thing right.

The goal isn’t to have it all. The goal is to have choices.

But choices don’t materialize because we want them badly enough. We create them by understanding our numbers, building relationships, making strategic decisions, and being willing to take calculated risks.

That’s what Beth and I explored in this conversation.

And if you’re at a point in your career or business where you’re questioning what comes next, I’d encourage you to start with one question:

Am I building a life that gives me more options, or am I just getting better at meeting everyone else’s expectations?

~ Monique

Listen to the full conversation

Beth Mazza joins me on Possibilities with Monique de Maio to discuss motherhood, money, ambition, financial independence, and building businesses that create freedom rather than consume it.

[Listen to Episode 118]

Explore Beth’s book, Entrepreneur Like a MOTHER, and the resources available through Female Mavericks.

And if you’re ready to get clearer about your own next move, explore my Strategic Advisor Sessions.